Imi amintesc

Imi amintesc, imi amintesc de acea perioada dintre 17-28 ani, totul mi se pare fara noima, fara inteles, in cap o singura intrebare exista;de ce?Chiar a meritat atatea compromisuri, de ce mi-a dat aripi ca sa zbor dupa moartea tatalui meu, doar ca mai tarziu sa mie le franga, caderea aceasta fiind la fel de dureroasa.De ce atata suferinta?De ce sa revina ea in viata mea dupa atat timp?Cine e ea sa-mi posede sufletu?Nu vreau sa cad din nou,stiu cat de greu m-am ridicat.
Imi amintesc ultimul dialog:
-De ce pleci?

-Am devenit dependenta de tine.

-Nu pleca, nu-mi fa asta.

-Plec,imi pare rau, nu stiu ce vreau,nu imi mai stiu visele.

Si ai plecat si am ramas cu acel trandafir alb in mana, il strangeam asa de tare, dar nu simteam nimic din cauza suferintei , nu simteam spinii ce-mi intrau in palma.Atunci inima mea era ingradita de un gard de spini care imi apasau pe inima din ce ince mai tare, lasandu-ma fara respiratie, fara vointa de a mai continua.
Vezi tu atunci cand ai plecat ai lasat in urma un gol imens in mine un nimic, cu greu am reusit sa imi revin.

Era asa de greu sa spui acele doua cuvinte?Stiu si mie mi-a fost greu sa le spun in anumite momente,poate pentru ca-mi era teama sau poate pentru ca nu erau sincere .Cu tine insa totul a fost uimitor, minunat,cuvintele au iesit negandite de mintea mea doar de inima.Stiam ca si tu tii la mine stiam ca ma iubesti , sau esti doar actrita foarte buna?Chiar asa de bine ai reusit sa imiti acele atingeri , acele sarutari pasionale, acele nopti fara somn?SPune-mi tu ai vreun regret, tu remuscari?

Raspunde-mi la aceasta scrisoare, scrie-mi ce s-a intampalt, de ce a decurs totul asa?Raspunde-mi la aceasta scrisoare, fa-mi o promisiune, si apoi ne vom intalni .Stiu ca atunci cand promiti ceva nu iti incalci cuvantul, e singurul mod prin care voi sti ca nu se va mai repeta trecutul.

Angels

Angels

According to any dictionary an angel is a supernatural being found in many religions. In Christianity, Judaism, Zoroastrianism and Islam, angels, as attendants or guardians to man, typically act as messengers from God , but I want to disagree , anyone can be an angel , and everybody has a different perception of what an angel is . How do you think an angel looks like , exactly how the bible describes them , with white wings and pure , so pure that you can see them shine?There probably are angels who look like that , but why do we think angels are so divine , because they live next to God in the sky ? For me an angel could be someone who makes me happy , who shows me what life is all about , love and not pain .There are angels here on earth too , it just takes sometime for us to seek them , to find them , but when we do , we must hold them so tight to our chest , to make them hear our heart beat, so they should understand why our hearts are really beating , because they are the ones who makes them beat , they are the ones who make them go wild , and they must know that, so they never leave us .
These passing years there have been few moments when I thought I have found my angel , but I was wrong every single time , they weren't angels , they were more like archangels , maybe it was my mistake because I couldn't make them hear the sound of my heart , or maybe it was their fault because they didn't know how to listen . When I did them wrong , I’ve always thought that somehow I was the one to blame , but that doesn't mean that they are without guilt; their sin was that they have made me feel so much for them , and in the end when they saw how I much I care , they just took my mind , my soul , my whole being and destroyed them; in that moment I turned to God , and asked why has he left these angels on earth , so they can hurt me , so they can taunt me with their happiness , or were they just angels created for someone else?But unfortunately I have crossed there paths and got hurt along the way ;does that make me a casualty of a an already lost war? Am I just a victim of bad choices ?... Or does life has something better in stored for me , an angel only for me ?… Probably to know how to appreciate my angel , I must first know how bad it would be without one.
There are three things that guide you to your real angel , your mind , your soul and most importantly your heart , but sometimes each of them find a different angel and they become confused , they don't know which one to chose;every angel that they seek have the qualities that one wants but not the other .It is said that a man can be fully happy only when his mind , soul , and heart become as one , when they can live in harmony in your body , but no one knows how to do that;I don't even know someone that is like that. I hear people saying, that they are happy with their lives , of the angel that life gave them , I don't want to judge them , but I think they are only kidding themselves ;we all know better what we want , and some of the things we want from our angel can be misunderstood by our society , so they just get used to what society offers them .
To find the angel we want we always must desire more , and you must know clearly first what you want , you must know for sure what your feelings are , what your pain is , and what kind of angel you think can sooth your pain .
If you ever find your angel , don't ever let go , because that is the one for you and if you let your angel fly , then you won’t find another one , so if you find your angel , consider yourself the luckiest man on earth , and tell the others what you did, to find it , so there can find there own angel.